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Vishal
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# Posted: 20 Aug 2007 02:10 · Edited by: Vishal
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In most service oriented professions, we are often required to repress our true emotions. For example, people working in call centers are required to talk in a friendly tone even if the customer on the other end loses his/her cool and is on the wrong side.
The same scenario may apply to families too where young are often suppressed and not allowed to raise their voice in front the elders even if the elders are wrong.
Well, a research shows that if you constantly do this, then it is spiking your stress levels.
"Every time a person is forced to repress his true feelings there are negative consequences for his health," said Professor Dieter Zapf, a researcher into human emotions.
The study tested students working in an imaginary call centre who were subject to abuse from clients.
Some of the participants were allowed to answer back, while others had to be polite and friendly all the time.
Those who stood up to clients had a rapid heartbeat for a brief period, but for those who had to remain friendly their heart was still racing long after the client had hung up.
The conclusion reached by the psychologists was that "being friendly against one's will causes nothing but stress".
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Dr_Broadland
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# Posted: 23 Aug 2007 07:48
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In fact violence against service personnel has increased so much in the UK and in North America, that there are signs everywhere threatening prosecution. If you travel in a bus in London or Toronto, you see a prominent sign telling you in no uncertain terms that any violence or verbal abuse of the employees of the bus company will be dealt with serious and you will be prosecuted.
There is the opposite aspect of this when as a user of such services you are constantly reminded of this threat. However, when such abuse occurs and no action against the customer ensues, what is your reaction as an observer?
I was travelling in a bus in London, and the bus driver appeared to have moved off too quick after discharging a very slow moving passenger. I was one of the two passengers who saw that the fault was not the driver's but rather that of the passenger, who had started to step down and then got back up for reasons unknown to everybody to this day. There was abuse to the driver and three way verbal fight. Most of the passengers saying the driver was bad and abusing him, the other witness who started being on my side of the facts and turning against to join the wave of abusers. I was the only one besides the driver, who had actually seen the passenger get completely off and then go back up! Left me with a sleepless night to say the least, and to make matters worse, the driver had decided not to report the matter, because I was the only witness on his side.
The question then is "what do you do when you are dragged unwittingly into a stressful situation which is not of your making?" Would I have been smarter, if I had let the driver and the other passengers discuss it out, and then given the driver my name and phone number quietly? Should I have withdrawn completely from the episode and let others handle it? It is difficult to know what my stress level would have been had I reacted differently. My general feeling is that if you let off steam at the time of the stressful incidence, it is likely to cause the least stress. On the other hand, if such a stressful event is likely to occur repeatedly, you would have to develop more elaborate defence mechanisms.
Is that why most city folk long to get away from it all and they abandon their beautiful homes to go to a cottage somewhere with inadequate facilities?
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Vishal
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# Posted: 24 Aug 2007 01:28 · Edited by: Vishal
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Quoting: undefined It is difficult to know what my stress level would have been had I reacted differently. My general feeling is that if you let off steam at the time of the stressful incidence, it is likely to cause the least stress. On the other hand, if such a stressful event is likely to occur repeatedly, you would have to develop more elaborate defence mechanisms.
Majority of the stress people go through is when they have no idea of how to cope with a situation or they feel they are entirely responsible for a particular situation. This where why awareness (meditation) and a understanding that nothing is in our control helps.
When you are completely aware of a situation, there is a great deal of clarity and the decision you take are most likely to be the ideal one. Now you can't be aware of a situation without having a deeper understanding that everything is in this world is beyond your control. Only with this understanding can you be aware and detached. Once you have done your best (which only comes with complete awareness) and have left the rest to the almighty, then only can you be free of stress. This is the only way.
From Bhagavad - Gita:
Perform every action with your heart fixed on the Supreme Lord. Renounce attachment to the fruits. Be even-tempered in success and failure; for it is this evenness of temper which is meant by yoga.
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Dr_Broadland
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# Posted: 25 Aug 2007 22:59
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Thanks for the explanation
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TajviRAC
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# Posted: 16 Apr 2008 15:17
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i don't know whether keeping low the emotions or personal feelings and stresses halp much or not.
but in my observation the military and special forces have done a lot of experiments in this sector to build their perfect soldier.
a military man is exposed to high pressure, trmendous stress and monotonous duties.
yet they need to keep apiece since that's how they are trianed.
i think if the military could share some of its experiences with us, that'd be excellent.
thanks.
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CoolNcalm
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# Posted: 16 Apr 2008 18:59
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I personally experienced a great deal of stress whilst unable to express my true feelings in an abusive marriage. The fact that I couldn't tell anyone what I was going through for fear of reprisals made things so much worse than if I had been able to confide in someone.
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Vishal
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# Posted: 17 Apr 2008 01:45
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Quoting: TajviRAC but in my observation the military and special forces have done a lot of experiments in this sector to build their perfect soldier.
Being in one piece doesn't mean the person is stress free. By not allowing to express your emotions, your are creating a volcano inside and soldiers release that in the battle-field. If not, elsewhere. Do you want to be like them?
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CoolNcalm
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# Posted: 19 Apr 2008 02:32
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Exactly, the soldiers have a very violent outlet available to their most violent of bottled up emotions. That is not appropriate for the man on the street-and if we do the sort of thing that they do, we'll likely end up in prison.
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Dr_Broadland
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# Posted: 25 Apr 2008 12:32
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Quoting: Vishal Being in one piece doesn't mean the person is stress free. By not allowing to express your emotions, your are creating a volcano inside and soldiers release that in the battle-field.
Experience from Korean, Vietnam and recently from Iraqi war, has shown that a soldier returning from these experiences is much more violent personality and suffers from stress related conditions more than an average civilian who was not exposed to such horrors of war. We do not have as much information and record of psychological states of mind of soldiers who returned from the two big world wars. The words 'shell shocked" emerged from those wars, but there was very little if any attention paid to the mental state of these ex-war heroes and combatants.
Perhaps some of the other forum members might have read more about the effects on the soldiers during those two major wars, and might want to share their knowledge and conclusions.
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TajviRAC
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# Posted: 30 Apr 2008 11:22
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Glad to see your valuable comments.
What I wanted to point out is the "success" of the military even temporarily to keep their men free form the stress.
Certainly, the warlords are not much anxious about the soldiers on retirement or out of field.
But they could make them much more "resistant" to stress.
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Dr_Broadland
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# Posted: 1 May 2008 12:13
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Quoting: TajviRAC Glad to see your valuable comments. What I wanted to point out is the "success" of the military even temporarily to keep their men free form the stress. Certainly, the warlords are not much anxious about the soldiers on retirement or out of field.
Historically, ever since Homo Sapiens (man) began to acquire the rudiments of civilization characterized by living together in one space as a group and sharing tasks, it is recorded successively that he had to fight collectively to ward of intruders and jealous neighbouring tribes.
This tribal integrity with its hierarchical structure of command translated into nations with a common form of government and ambitions. What we have today is the rudiments of awareness of the world as a whole (United Nations Organisation) with extremely limited authority, and certain areas of multinational unity such as the European Common market, but let us not be deceived. The world consists of several nations, each with its own separate agenda.
For the preservation of nationhood (originally kingdom) there was need to have soldiers to ward off attacks, and therefore the training of soldiers to cope with stress has ancient origins and there is an established evolving form of indoctrination of soldiers based largely on patriotism theme. Such a well established form of coping with the intense stress of actual combat keeps the soldier functioning comfortably, and the effects of stress start showing only after discharge from these duties and only if the state ignores or rejects the ex-soldier's needs.
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TajviRAC
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# Posted: 13 May 2008 15:21
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Thank you Dr_Broadland,
But don't you think that now a days we have more soldiers who all are simply working (or say, fighting) for money only.
Many armed groups in Asia, Latin America and Africa don't have anymore ideology in front of them.
Have you heard about "Green card soldiers?"
Certainly, most of these soldiers I mentioned can't get a relief from the stress by virtue of "patriotism".
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